According to Mad Men, Joan is a morale booster.
According to Mad Men, San Antonio is lovely in the winter.
According to Mad Men, "procedures" is a fine euphemism for "abortions."
According to Mad Men, sailors love Times Square on New Year's Eve.
According to Mad Men, Lane would like a breast and a thigh.
According to Mad Men, if one looks, one will understand where things go.
According to Mad Men, beer and abalone is a great combination.
According to Mad Men, college students are a good source of weed.
According to Mad Men, there's nothing worse than an evangelical.
According to Mad Men, the best way to relieve the stress of discovering a loved one has cancer is to smoke a cigarette.
According to Mad Men, aliens do not scare Don Draper.
According to Mad Men, a patch of new paint is as bad as a stain.
According to Mad Men, there are bison in Catalina.
According to Mad Men, it is difficult to determine where there is a greater concentration of Mexicans: southern California or Acapulco.
According to Mad Men, hillbillies love to eat donkey dick.
According to Mad Men, Howdy Doody has a wooden dick.
According to Mad Men, Godzilla is awesome when you're drunk.
According to Mad Men, Pete Campbell is unintentionally friendly.
According to Mad Men, Lane wants his beef!
According to Mad Men, Lane's got a big Texas belt buckle. Yee-ha!
According to Mad Men, Rudy Jensen's mother believes him to be the next Bob Dylan.
According to Mad Men, some hookers love deer.
According to Mad Men, sex with hookers makes Lane thirsty!
According to Mad Men, it's always a good idea to strip your bed after another man uses it for fornication.