According to Mad Men, homemade knives are pretty neat.
According to Mad Men, children often misspell "ruse."
According to Mad Men, a glass and gin and a box of velveeta makes for a swell Christmas party.
According to Mad Men, secretaries can handle Christmas shopping with ease.
According to Mad Men, Fraternities are good business networking tools.
According to Mad Men, lying about your name denotes a private phone call.
According to Mad Men, the ability to wear white pants during your period is on par with the polio vaccine.
According to Mad Men, there's nothing like committing suicide on Christmas.
According to Mad Men, one must be beautiful to make the jump from Broadway to the silver screen.
According to Mad Men, girls are better at making ads for makeup than men.
According to Mad Men, Lee Garner Jr. cares not about food.
According to Mad Men, if Lee Garner Jr. wants three wise men flown in from Jerusalem, he gets them.
According to Mad Men, elderly women are unable to ice cakes without shaking.
According to Mad Men, handjobs are inferior to sex.
According to Mad Men, in Sweden, men and women make love the minute they feel attracted to one another.
According to Mad Men, Peggy Olsen approves of marijuana, but disapproves of the Swedes.
According to Mad Men, Chinese delivery from Peking House is chronically tardy.
According to Mad Men, nothing makes old ladies look good.
According to Mad Men, Medicare and civil rights lead directly to socialism.
According to Mad Men, Lee Garner Jr. loves conga lines.
According to Mad Men, Lee Garner Jr. loves Polaroid cameras.
According to Mad Men, bears are responsible for most kitchen vandalism in America.
According to Mad Men, it's not really rape if he's your boss, and really drunk.
According to Mad Men, it's very embarrassing to forget that you banged your secretary in a drunken stupor.
