Sure, that looks ridiculous, but I see no reason why anyone would assume that this means the movie got fucked up. I mean, it is, after all, a Michael Bay movie. So that means (objectively) that it's going to be an awesome movie full of big explosions. So I'm excited. (Although probably not as much as Suzi.)

Also, I fully blame Jim for my acceptance of Michael Bay, among other things. (I definitely know way more about Star Wars than I ever wanted to, and it comes out at some totally inappropriate times, too. THANKS JIM.)

Technically, I'm complaining not that this future sequel got fucked up. Maybe it'll be awesome. Maybe I'll get hit by a truck today. WHO KNOWS?

I'm complaining that the first Transformers movie, the one that already exists, was, in the past, fucked up. I guess that could have been clearer. You know what else could have been clearer? Which robot was which in the fucking Transformers movie about robots.

The robots are indistinguishable so that you have to watch it three times before you understand wtf is going on. It's like how you had to watch Wolverine and Clue until you saw all the different endings. Genius marketing, assuming audiences are all people like me who feel like they need to understand what they saw (i'm on my 32nd viewing of Eraserhead, btw).

Suzie's excited because she saw Megan Fox's hot hot hot hot hot hot hot ass bent over a motorcycle. Bonus points please...

I don't even care about telling the robots apart. Based on the preview, I can barely recognize the robots as objects that exist somewhere in the space of the movie. Everything is just CGI static.

TRANSFORMERS!

ROBOTS IN DISGUISE!

TRANSFORMERS!

MORE THAN MEETS THE EYE!

Greg, you old man... One day I'll tell you all about computers so you'll no longer need your personal assistant who transcribes your written words into emails and blog comments.