What's cool in middle school?

Apparently, neither stink bombs nor endangering the lives of less-than-innocent eighth graders.

            So today was eventful over at dear old Riverwood. This morning, between first and second period, a stink bomb was set off in the middle of the 400-600 hallways (don't even ask how the halls are numbered at school. It makes no sense.). The entire school smelled so terrible that students began stuffing their faces into their armpits because it smelled so much better in there. Yeah. For three hours.

            My personal opinion here is that they should have closed school, preferably for three or four years, but no such luck. As it turns out, they can't cancel school for something so "minor." So we were stuck. The teachers probably hated it as much as we did, but we had no choice except to stick it out.

            But Providence intervened. During fourth period, the fire alarm went off. It would have been great, since fourth period = science with Mr. Perv, but no, sir. It was during my LUNCH period.

            Now, this was not the first fire alarm (not drill. There's a difference. The difference is that a fire alarm means that there's probably an actual fire.) in Mr. Perv's class. Just yesterday the alarm went off during his class. We were a little concerned, since everyone always hears about it before a normal fire drill, which meant there was actually a risk of a fire. We weren't nearly as loud as the alarm, but we were a tad disorderly as we left the class, our chairs not fully pushed in.

            Not good enough for Mr. Perv (so named for being terrifyingly disgusting in the way he stares at thirteen year old girls). He made us go back to our desks, sit down, and then silently stand and line up, pushing in our chairs as we went.

            It took two more minutes than it did last time. I wonder why.

            Anyway, some kids busted Mr. Perv to the principle, including an indignant D.O. She was upset because "Lemonpies!" was recently declared a swear word in science, punishable by detention, due to the extreme overuse.

            At least Mrs. Z was happy. Her class is no longer the slowest evacuator in the school.