It's been over a month since we last checked in with the cast of our favorite dead TV show.  Too bad the cast hasn't really been that busy in the meantime.  But before we catch up with all our old friends, let me offer an apology to Sonja Sohn, better known to you and I as Detective Kima "Huge Lesbo" Greggs. Last time we caught her was slumming it up in Step Up 2 The Streets playing foster mother to some obxnoxious white girl.  Well, flipping through the channels the other day, looking for another playing of Drumline or Stomp The Yard, I caught a scene of the original Step Up.  And who did I see playing the mother of an obnoxious dancing white girl?


That's right, it's Deirdre Lovejoy, better known as sassy redhead and Assistant State's Attorney Rhonda Pearlman.  Sonja, I apologize.  You thought playing the mother of sassy dancing white girls was okay, because your fellow cast member set a bad example.  For shame, Deirdre.  For shame.  Now, on to the update.

Melanie Nicholls-King
Played Cheryl, baby-crazy scissoring-partner for the aforementioned lesbo Detective Greggs.

Oh come on, don't tell me you don't know what scissoring is.  Okay, well, as usual, I'll let South Park explain.  But don't play unless you really, really want to know.



Moving on.

Last seen in: Commercial for the new Viera TV, playing a housewife, or something. 

Whatever.

Thomas McCarthy
Played Scott Pendleton, Baltimore Sun reporter and Philip Glass surrogate

Last seen in: Baby Mama, on date with Tina Fey.  Lucky bastard.

When I first saw the trailer for Baby Mama, I had such high hopes.  Hey, I love Tina Fey and 30 Rock.  And Mean Girls was surprisingly good.  Maybe Baby Mama, despite it's kinda lame jokes in the trailer, could be another notch in Tina Fey's belt.  Plus, the whole Baltimore Sun storyline was the weakest story played on all five seasons of The Wire.  Could this be the first ever not-down arrow given to a former Wire cast member? 

Well, then the reviews came in, and I got so discouraged I didn't even see the movie.  So, uh, no. 

Frankie Faison
Played Ervin Burrell, police commissioner and part of the problem

Last seen in: My Blueberry Nights, as Travis

Honestly? I didn't even see this.  I only know about it because Jim gave me the heads up.  This movie looked retarded.  People love Wong Kar-Wai for some reason.  Uh, well, the second half of Chungking Express was sort of entertaining. 

Method Man
Played Cheese Wagstaff, street thug who was too disrespectful for his own good

Last seen in: CSI, reprising his role as nightclub owner Drops.

Did you know his first name is Clifford? Anyway, just because you acknowledge that you are ripping off the plot from 48 Hours in a line of dialogue doesn't make it all okay, CSI.  I expect this kind of nonsense from CSI: Miami, but not you.  You're better than this.