Welcome to a new feature here at ObscureBlog.  In List of the Obscure, we chronicle the furthest reaches of pop culture.  In list form.  Because, uh, doesn't everyone like lists? Seriously, how am I supposed to have a website without some sort of list on it? I actually thought websites came with lists pre-installed, but turns out I have to write it myself and everything. 

List of the Obscure: Because some things haven't been put into lists yet (TM).

1. Armageddon and Deep Impact (1998)

Did you ever get the feeling that the movie you are seeing an ad for already came out? Or that Hollywood was creatively bankrupt? Yeah, me too.  Turns out we weren't hallucinating.  And I'm not even talking about the endless string of remakes, or when a genre suddenly becomes popular, like Save the Last Step Up 2 The Yard Dance, or Jerky-Moving Pale-Faced Japanese Girl Horror Theater.  I'm talking about really specific plot points.  Sometimes they don't even try to hide it - they just make the same movie twice! In the same year!  We'll start with 1998's dueling space-object-hurtling-towards-earth movies, Armageddon and Deep Impact.

Well, I guess I'm not giving them enough credit for being different, because, you see, Armageddon is about an asteroid, and Deep Impact is about a comet, and...and...whatever, that's as much defending as I'm about to do.

Ridiculously Identical Plot Point
The comet/asteroid hurtling towards Earth can only be stopped by sending a rag-tag group of astronauts to bury a nuclear bomb under the surface to destroy it.

Box office
Deep Impact  $140.46M
Armageddon  $201.58M

Tomatometer
Deep Impact  44%
Armageddon  41%

Ebert's take
Deep Impact  "... the movie as a whole is pretty routine." (2.5 stars)
Armageddon  " Here it is at last, the first 150-minute trailer." (1 star)

My take: The real disaster? These movies made a combined $340 million. Winner: Deep Impact

2. A Bug's Life and Antz (1998)

Was there a writer's strike in 1998 that I'm not aware of? Does anyone else have an explanation for why they kept making movies twice that year? 

I actually think that Dreamworks missed a winning formula here.  Why stop at Antz? How about:

Toyz, starring Woody Allen as the voice of neurotic Cabbage Patch Kid;
Monzterz, starring Woody Allen as the voice of a neurotic Sasquatch;
Carz, starring Woddy Allen as the voice of a neurotic compact car

Ridiculously Identical Plot Point
Uh, both of them are about bugs? What more do you want?

Box office
A Bug's Life $162.8M
Antz  $90.8M

Tomatometer
A Bug's Life  91%
Antz  97%

Ebert's Take
A Bug's Life  "The story ... is similar in some ways to the autumn's other big animated release, "Antz," but it's aimed at a broader audience and lacks the in-jokes." (3.5 stars)
Antz  "It enters into a microscopic world .. and makes it into a world so vast and threatening that comparisons with ``Star Wars'' are not unjustified." (3.5 stars)

My take: Uh, was somebody comparing Antz to Star Wars? Really, Roger? All I remember is that the Jennifer Lopez ant had a big ass, too.  Push

3. Volcano and Dante's Peak (1997)

If the late '90s are to be remembered for anything other than the dot-com boom and Monica Lewinsky, it should be that every fucking movie got made twice.  At least this time one was a comedy.  What? Yes. Dante's Peak was a comedy.  That scene where grandma has to jump out of the boat into the lake of acid and push everyone ashore? HILARIOUS. I laughed for days.  Or, should I say, I laffed.

Ridiculously Identical Plot Point
Climactic scene where our hero must outrun the eruption to save his family.

Box Office
Volcano  $49.3M
Dante's Peak  $67.1M

Tomatometer
Volcano  42%
Dante's Peak  32%

Ebert's Take
Volcano  "The ads say 'The Coast Is Toast,' but maybe they should say 'The Volcano Is Drano.' This is a surprisingly cheesy disaster epic." (1.5 stars)
Dante's Peak  "'Dante's Peak' is constructed about as skillfully as a disaster movie can be, and there were times when I found it working for me, sort of." (2.5 stars)

My take: I actually saw Volcano in theaters.  I was such a tool in 1997.  Winner: Dante's Peak

4. United 93 and World Trade Center (2006)

For all those future filmmakers wondering "How long do I have to wait to use a world-changing disaster as the inspiration for my movie?"  Paul Greengrass and Oliver Stone have answered your question: 5 years. "But what if it feels to soo..." No. No more questions.  The answer is 5 years.  Next question.

Ridiculously Identical Plot Point
Terrorists hijack airplanes and fly them into the World Trade Center and Pentagon.  Been there, done that, invaded Iraq.

Box office
United 93  $31.5M
World Trade Center $70.3M

Tomatometer
United 93  91%
World Trade Center  70%

Ebert's Take
United 93  "This is a masterful and heartbreaking film, and it does honor to the memory of the victims." (4 stars)
World Trade Center  "The phrase "less is more" just isn't in Stone's directorial vocabulary." (2.5 stars)

My take:  By all accounts, United 93 was a powerful, apolitical telling of a real American tragedy.  Too bad everyone saw the shlocky Oliver Stone version.  Winner: the terrorists.

5. The Prestige and the Illusionist (2006)

Was there a writer's strike in 2006? Does anyone else have an explana ... oh shit, I already made this joke about 1998, didn't I. This list is really starting to have an effect on me.

The Prestige had magician's brutally maiming each other, crazy twists left and right, and Billy Idol as Nikolai Tesla.  Yes, this awesome movie worked Tesla into the plot.  The Illusionist had, uh, well, it had Jessica Biel in those period costume's that push the girl's boobs really high.  That was cool.

Oh wait, The Prestige had Scarlett Johanssen in period costume with high boobs, too.  Yeah, The Illusionist sucked.  In soft focus.

Ridiculously Identical Plot Point
Like, the whole movie was a magic trick, man! Trippy.

Box office
The Prestige $53.1M
The Illusionist  $39.9M

Tomatometer
The Prestige  75%
The Illusionist  75%

Ebert's Take
The Prestige  "What you will learn in the movie is, I believe, a disappointment -- nothing but a trick about a trick." (3 stars)
The Illusionist " If 'The Illusionist' approaches the realm of art, its spell is heightened by a subtly mesmerizing Philip Glass score and cinematographer Dick Pope's flickering, sepia-tinted visuals..." (3.5 stars)

My take: A tie? WHAT? Unbelievable.  I saw both these movies, and The Prestige was awesome.  How did this happen... Winner: Push The hell with that, its my list, and I'll arbitrarily change the rules if I want.  Winner: The Prestige