Results filed under: “diamonds”

@ December 21, 2008

You know what really grinds my gears?  Things that claim to never end.  Infinity is a scientific concept, not a reality.  How dare you tell me that something will last forever or that things will never end.  You are violating physics!  Next thing I know you'll tell me that the earth was created in 7 days by some magical magician man.  Now that's too much.

I'm talking about you Pizza Hut.  I find it hard to believe that your PANormous Pizza never ends.  IT NEVER ENDS!!!  Are you for real [Interrobang]   How can you make a claim like that [Interrobang]  Watch this commercial (sorry about the bad quality...I'm too lazy to find something better).  When Pizza Hut says that this pizza will never end it actually says on the screen that it is "over 40% bigger than our large pan pizza".  When I'm watching the Golden Girls and the commercials come on and I finally lose my wood from all of the 60 year old sex talk and then I hear something like "pizza that never ends" that is literally a cock tease.  How is this allowed [Interrobang]  Grrrr.

And what do you think comes on after that Pizza Hut commercial.  This commercial for diamonds.  First of all bucko, love doesn't last forever.  Just pick up this weeks US Weekly and look at the front cover saying that J-Lo and M-Ant (that's what I call him) are splits-ville.  I mean when I think of love their relationship is the first thing that comes to mind.  Second of all, I know that you are implying that a diamond is the second thing.  I mean it certainly isn't that elderly couple.  I think that guy is already dead.  I'll give you that diamonds last a long time.  But how is anything longer than time [Interrobang]  THAT DOESN'T EVEN MAKE SENSE!!!  God (Oh yeah...that's what they call that magician guy.) I want to slap someone [...come here Rose...].  I guarantee you that before time ends that diamond will end.  So there De Beers...suck on that.  You jerks.

And I know that there are probably more false advertisements out there, but lucky for them that they don't make Lifetime's Golden Girl demographic...but maybe they'll make Will & Grace's...hehe.


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