Results filed under: “blogging”

I know it feels like I just did this, but this time its for good. If you are thinking to yourself, "Hey, the site kind of looks like somebody actually designed it now," that's because the Suze helped me out. If you are thinking, "Hey, the site looks like somebody designed it now, except a couple of things are sloppy and retarded and aren't working right," well, that's because I also had a hand in it.

Got an opinion on the new look, or found a bug I should take a look at fixing? Leave it in the comments. Got a website and need some design help? You can check out some more work by the Suze here.

We'll see if this side project lasts longer than "Things Lighter Than CC Sabathia" did.

Find it here.

(After last week's episode of The Office, that is now how I greet everybody on their birthdays.)

That's right, it was one year ago today that I started writing this website. I've decided to mark the occasion as all aging, sagging franchises do - with a clip show! That's right, I've gone through the Obscure Archives to find my 5 favorite pieces from the past year.  They are, in no particular order:

Her Super Sweet 16 
My first big hit was a chat I had with a soon-to-be-sixteen your old girl, who posted on Craigslist that she was looking for some paparazzi-style photographers to cover her party.  Interesting side note: in a later (still unpublished) email, I was threatened with legal action! Good times.

City: The Henpecker's Credit Card of Choice
One of my favorite running features is advertising criticism.  This one gets the nod because (A) I really, really hate that ad, and (B) I got to use the word "menstruating".

Somebody Else's Business: Dear Prudence (08-28-2008)
I always thought it would be fun to write an advice column.  The barrier to entry is that you need people to send you questions and shit.  At least, I thought you did, until I realized I could just take other people's columns, rip out their stupid answers, and stick in my own!  Hence, Somebody Else's Business was born.  This column from last summer is my favorite.

Grinds My Gears: The Neverending Story
One of the most exciting developments in the site over the past year has been the wonderful contributions of the Suze (who also happens to be my wife), Jim, Kevin, Kevin's little sister Jessica, and Daytrader, the author of the column above.  It was tough to pick just one, because I appreciate everybody's contributions, but "When I'm watching the Golden Girls and the commercials come on and I finally lose my wood from all of the 60 year old sex talk" is probably the best sentence that anyone has written for this blog to date.

Answer the Suze, issue 1
Not only is this the first article I wrote for the website, I still think it is the best column from my best ongoing feature, Answer the Suze.

Well, that's it for today's self-congratulatory wank-fest.  I'll get back to writing real articles again soon.  Before I do that, though, I want to thank everybody for their encouragement and participation in this hobby of mine - it has been too much fun.

Not to toot my own horn or anything, but I'd say this whole blog experiment is going pretty well.  I'm not embarrassed by the appearance of my website, I have at least 2 or 3 people who read it regularly, and I even got other websites with actual readerships to link to me, like, three times.  Nice, right?

I'd say that I've pretty much accomplished what I set out to do.  But with accomplishment comes complacency.  I don't want to stagnate, I want to thrive.  I need a new goal.  So, along those lines, I was thinking to myself: what do I need to take this whole blog project to the next level?  Not in the sense of "how can I become a rich and famous douchebag not contributing anything to society except my rambling on the internets", but rather "what would make running this website even more awesome?"

The first step in the further awesome-ization of ObscureCraft was to start inviting other people to write, and its been pretty great.  I can't describe how wonderful it feels to see a new post come up that I didn't write.  it just... happened.  It'd be like coming home to find that the dog walked itself.  Dog, how did you do that?!

It's been difficult to determine what else I could do that would top that.  But I've finally decided.  I have a goal for myself.

Coming this summer: ObscureCraft will have an intern.

Think about it: there are 4 or 5 different colleges in Houston.  They must be filled with communications majors who won't be able to find paying work this summer because of the economy, but still want some experience.  So, I'll post on Craigslist, saying local website looking for communications major intern.  Duties include web and logo design and creative writing.

I wouldn't pay, but it would also take, like, 3-4 hours a week at most, right? Plus I could choose my (obviously female) intern based ENTIRELY on looks, because its not like what I do takes any real skill.  This is my dream. 

But here's the problem: even though it is a small commitment, the intern will want something in return.  She needs to be able to put this experience on a resume.  And the only way to give that any value is if this site increases its reach.  So, I'm only going to do the intern project if I get to 50 readers by April.

So: if you enjoy this site, or you just enjoy the thought of me attempting to hire an intern for a summer position writing for ObscureCraft, then I need you to find me more readers.  Help me help you, internet.  Spread the word.  Together, we can get me an attractive female intern for the summer.

I got bored with how the site looked, which will happen from time to time.  Please pardon my dust while I play with the site.  Or don't pardon it, whatever.  Like I care what you think, internet.

Internet, I'm just kidding.  You know I can't stay mad at you.  I actually want to know what you think - tell me in the comments.  Please?

Regular readers of this site have no doubt noticed that we've had a few guest bloggers in recent weeks.  Turns out I know people who don't already have their own blog!

If you find yourself filled some combination of rage and envy because you aren't joining the roster of distinguished ObscureCraft contributors, let me know.  Tell me what you want to write about and we'll see what we can do. 

ObscureCraft has a new RSS feed that combines posts to the blog and select photographs from my Flickr Photostream.  The old RSS feed will not get the new content.  So, if you want to keep getting these truth nuggets everyday along with the occasional picture, you'll need to re-subscribe by clicking on the RSS icon in the sidebar.  That's the big orange thingy.

Aggregate your feeds!!

In the most recent issue of Somebody Else's Business, we were treated to a wonderfully whacked letter from a recent mother who was aghast at her husband for looking at porn.  The horror!

"I'm shocked, disgusted, and feel betrayed. I'm up with the baby all night, and he's having a party downstairs."

When I first read this, I assumed that she was upstairs with the baby, while her husband was downstairs at the computer.  Astute OC reader Greg writes:

"So is [the] computer on the ground floor, or is "having a party downstairs" a euphemism?"

Well, if it wasn't a euphemism before, it is now.  From now on, you aren't looking at porn on the computer.  You're having a party downstairs!

But is looking at pornography the only thing we do on the computer's that we are ashamed of?  A problem has cropped up recently.  And that problem is blog shame.

Much of the subject matter for this website is recounting the occasionally amusing or interesting things that happen in my life.  But now, whenever something potentially blog worthy happens, The Suze has taken to exclaiming in a loud voice: "You should blog about this!"

Ugh.  Okay, yes, I have a blog.  But does she have to tell everyone? I feel like she just announced to the room that I need to go apply hemorrhoid medicine.  I prefer to blog in the privacy of my own home, when nobody is around.  I take a few minutes on the computer, do what I need to do, and then get on with my life.  Which are also the ideal computer porn watching conditions. 

So from now on:

Watching porn on the computer? You're having a party downstairs.
Blogging? That's a party upstairs.